Popcorn and Pearls
by FoxwolfJackson
Summary: Master Hand has a guilty pleasure; he is secretly a Naruto fan. What will happen when, in boredom, he decides to steal characters from other worlds to record a "live-action Naruto series"? A fic that's part parody and part serious with possible pairings.
1. Meet the Cast

Author's Notes: For those of you Spellbinding Radiance fans who are worried about that fic, I can assure you that nothing bad will happen to the story. I'll still be working on it. I just need something to satisfy my more playful urges of humor as well as work on my third-person writing.

Please note that this fic is not a serious one so try not to treat it as such. Also, it's one mega crossover played for the laughs with some serious moments mixed in. If you can handle that and the off-the-wall premise this story has to offer, I hope you can enjoy what I have to offer! Without further ado, I present to you: Popcorn and Pearls

Chapter 1:

Meet the Cast

"Water... Earth... Fire... Air..."

"When there's trouble, you know who to call!"

"No whammy, no whammy, big bucks..."

"I wanna be the very best, like no one ever was."

"You are the Weakest Link. Goodbye!"

"Super hero, Static Shock."

"Transform and roll out!"

"The gig is down, so spoon it on over Jack Spicer!"

"D'oh!"

"One more thing! Why do you not watch Jade?"

"Return to the past NOW!"

The large, eighty-four inch flat screen high-definition television in the corner was connected to a huge, Dolby surround system fitted with Bose speakers and an amazing Phillips subwoofer in the somewhat spacious room. Various video game consoles were hooked up to the television set either through cables that latched onto the antenna/cable wire on the back of the television or through its very own audio/video wires. The room was a gamer's paradise and a moviegoer's dream. In the middle of the room was a couch that had a refrigerator and freezer combo plugged in next to it. A microwave sat on top of the combo ready to cook any hot pockets that were pulled from the freezer.

"Giggity!"

"Moon Prism Power Transformation!"

"Last time on DragonBall Z."

"Get your game on!"

"Is that your final answer?"

"It's time to d-d-d-d-d-duel!"

"I shall take a potato chip... and eat it!"

Who could own such a lavish room? There was one solitary figure sitting on the couch. Well, sitting was not the proper way to describe the action. More appropriate would be "resting" on the couch. A lone solitary white figure in the shape of a gloved hand sat on the couch. It sat down on the couch, flipping through channels on its remote.

"Premium package, my ass. There's nothing good to watch," the figure said. Who was this mysterious figure? Many in the gamer world knew of him as Master Hand, the sinister figure behind the first Super Smash Brothers game and co-villain with his brother Crazy Hand in the smash hit sequel Super Smash Brothers Melee.

He continued to flip through the hundreds of channels he had in a vain attempt to find something to quench his thirst for entertainment and satiate the boredom that had developed within him.

"Sing once again with me... our strange duet."

"No place like London!"

"Somewhere over the rainbow!"

"This. Is. Sparta!"

"Welcome to X-Play."

"Everything is made up and the points don't matter."

"In West Philadelphia born and raised, on the playground where I spent most of my days."

"Brain blast!"

"You may have to defeat my seven evil ex's."

"Next up is Makoto Nagano!"

"Now Tails, I'm going to get some chili dogs."

"I hate these stupid Rainbow Monkey things."

"Believe it!"

"And now the Superbowl between the Steelers and the Packers."

"To a night the four of us will never forget."

"Five-hundred, twenty-five thousand, six-hundred minutes!"

"Jelly fishing, jelly fishing."

"Crikey! This is the most venomous snake in all of Australia."

"I am Spartacus."

The television whined ever so slightly under the constant channel switching as the system's speakers were forced to change to each program's various volume levels and vocal timbres at such a rate.

"Independent Film Channel has a challenge for all you viewers out there to film your own television series and submit it to us. If your idea and show is good enough, we will air it on our very own station!"

It was this very commercial that sparked a lightbulb in the mind of Master Hand, wherever that mind may be located. If he cannot find a show to watch, he will create his own. Sometimes creating their own work is better than looking at someone else's. After all, is that not what certain Fire Emblem Path of Radiance self-insertion fanfiction writers do when they can't find a good, interesting story to read?

Master Hand floated off the couch and went to his backdoor to look at his backyard. An idea was formulating in his head. Floating back to his room, he looked at his shelves to find volumes of Naruto manga and episodes of the Naruto anime on shelves. Thus an idea was born in the head of Master Hand.

He would pick characters from the various universes he could visit, freeze time in their world, bring them to this world, and film a live-action adaptation of the Naruto anime. It was so brilliant that Master Hand clapped his thumb and pinky in glee. It would alleviate his boredom and it would bring to the multiverse the brilliance of the genius mind, directing, and production of Master Hand.

What would the actors be doing in the meantime between filming though and what would be their incentive to do this production? Master Hand began to build a small city from nothing in his huge backyard. There were a few small one-story houses that the actors could customize and live in while they were in the area. What was their prize? Well, they would find out if they asked.

It took Master Hand only three hours to collect some of the characters for his project. Confused faces were assembled on the outskirts of the "town" that Master Hand had only recently constructed for these characters. Each one of them looked at each other in confusion and slight psychosis at having been yanked so severely from their home worlds.

Master Hand appeared in front of the group and cleared his voice, as best as he could considering he was speaking telekinetically.

"Ladies and Gentlemen, you have been chosen by me to participate in a grand project that none of you will ever have the opportunity to ever come close to matching again. You are here to film a live action adaptation of a popular television program," Master Hand said.

"What's a television program?" one of the characters asked. Murmurs of agreement swept through the crowd as it seemed many of them were lost.

"Let me put it to you this way. You are all actors in a grand production that I shall be recording to show to the world," Master Hand said. "These recordings will be aired all over the multiverse and will entertain billions of viewers in existence."

"What's a multiverse?" one character asked. This was the same person who asked what was a television program. Master Hand groaned at the young lad's insistence to keep asking questions.

"This is why I cast you as Naruto," Master Hand muttered under his breath. He quickly regained his composure before giving an answer.

"The multiverse is a term that refers to different universes of existence. Each of you are from different universes in this multiverse. This once in a lifetime opportunity to meet each other is very rare," Master Hand explained. "Are there any other questions?"

"Yeah, how do we go back?" another person asked.

"After you complete filming the series, I shall return you right to where I picked you up from," Master Hand said.

"What is the reward for doing this?" the same person asked.

"You will not age in here. Time does not pass as long as you are in this world. For this world is time itself. You can choose to exit at the end of time—that is, if you want to meet Spekkio—or the beginning of time if you want to see the big bang. You can exit any time in between. Time does not touch you here. Because of this, you can train as much as you want in here or study as much as you want in here... and whatever you gain in here will stay with you when you return," Master Hand explained. "Anyone else have a question or wish to back out?"

"Sounds cool, I'm in," one person said. There were murmurs of agreement among the crowd.

"I have not gathered the entire cast because I feel it would be good to start with a core group of people and slowly assimilate new people as time goes on," Master Hand said. "With that, please introduce yourselves."

The boy who asked the first two questions stepped forward. He wore a vibrant red coat with dull brown suspenders going over it. He wore cobalt blue pants that went down to his boots that matched the red of his coat. Strapped around his waist were two scabbards that held two swords. He had light brown hair that spiked up in tufts. His eyes were of a darker brown; looking into them showed a level of maturity and optimism that was infectious to even those who did not know him.

"Hey everyone, my name is Lloyd Irving!" he said. One of the boys shuffled slightly upon hearing that name. The next person to step forward smiled at Lloyd and looked at everyone. Her white top was mostly covered by a light purple vest that went down past her waist. Her ample bust was clearly showing through her top, much to the observation of a few males present. She wore form-fitting black arm sleeves and lavender gloves that matched her vest. Around her waist was a huge pink sash that was tied in a bow behind her. Her bottom was a black pair of pants that clung to her skin as if it were form-fitting. One could almost call them tights. She wore boots that matched both the black of her sleeves and pants and the light color of her vest. Her brown eyes matched Lloyd's in color but was filled more with doubt and insecurity.

"Yeah, my name's Sheena Fujibayashi," she said. Again the same boy shuffled around slightly upon hearing the name of the girl. The third person to walk forward was wearing a form fitting black top which went all the way down to almost her thighs. The top also had sleeves that went down past the girl's wrists. She wore virtually nothing else on her body. Only other things she wore were dark blue boots and a matching dark blue blue cape that covered part of her top. Attached to the cape was a hood that covered her face. The only thing you could see were purple eyes peering out as if glaring at your soul.

"Raven," was her only word for introduction. The next person had dark brown hair that went down to her chin. She wore a black headband that was tied around her head. Her piercing blue eyes and deceptively calm smile betrayed both her immaturity and her wisdom to anyone who noticed. She wore a black tube top with white flower outlines on it with a black zippered vest on top of it. She wore brown shorts that barely went halfway down her thights. Her left hand had a black fingerless glove that went down to almost her elbow; her right hand held an enormous shuriken. She wore tan boots that went almost to her knees and were laced all the way up.

"The name's Yuffie Kisaragi! I am a speedy, stealthy warrior who enjoys various... hobbies," she said in a chipper, hyper tone. The next person to jump forward was wearing a monk's outfit. He wore a solid red top with solid black pants. He had a large, round head and had an attitude of confidence about himself. Around his waist, he wore a black belt to show his status as a warrior monk.

"The name is Omi and I shall be bringing the house up!" he said with confidence.

"Don't you mean bring the house _down_?" the last person said.

"Up, down, makes no difference!" Omi replied.

The final boy stood somewhat timidly in his place. He had dark brown hair that went down to his shoulders. He wore a billowing black robe that went down to his ankles with strange runic symbols in various colors all around his outfit. He wore brown boots that seemed tattered with travel. His nervous brown eyes were amplified by the glasses he wore on his face.

"My name's John. I'm... uh... an anima and dark mage?" he said tentatively before stepping back.

"Now that introductions are out of the way, I would like to thank you for joining on this project. You have two days to pick your house and make yourselves comfortable. If there's anything at all that you need, whether it be food or books or anything to make your house your home, then do not hesitate to ask.

With that, Master Hand left the six to tend to his own business. Soon filming and production would be starting... the Naruto Live Action Series.

The six of them looked at each other and made some small conversation as they pointed to the houses and picked which ones they wanted to live in. As they bade their farewells to each other, every one of them knew that this was going to be a crazy adventure... but none of them could have even dreamed how crazy this adventure would become.


	2. The First Six

Author's Notes: Well, I don't know what I'm going to do with this story or where I'm going to take it… but that doesn't matter because I'm going to just write it on the fly as I usually do. Try to bear with me as I try to get comfortable again with writing in third person again!

This chapter will be one of the last chapters to feature Master Hand before starting to focus more on the other characters. Also, couldn't help but have a guilty pleasure of having a small, John-centric portion of the chapter. If you are confused as to who he is, he is one of the OC characters in my other fanfic, Fire Emblem: Spellbinding Radiance. Why did I pick him? I think it'd be interesting to see how he stacks with meeting MORE canon characters whom he used to think were just video game characters... as well as I wouldn't mind describing the kind of dream house I'd have if I could afford it, haha.

Chapter 2

The First Six

"Crazy you must be?"

That was the question posed to Master Hand by his brother, Crazy Hand.

"You are a lot easier to understand when you're drunk," Master Hand muttered under your breath.

"Is property being ours! Need to film none at all in backyard of ours," Crazy Hand said.

"It is our property. I will do with the backyard as I please. Think of the money we could make."

"No money care I do."

"Think of the fame we could achieve!"

"Fame no me like."

"… think of the kittens we can buy with the money," Master Hand said, unwillingly pulling a trump card out of his sleeve that he hoped was not overused.

"Kittens a lot like I do!" Crazy Hand said enthusiastically. "Film you do!"

"Thank you," Master Hand said to his brother. He was quickly becoming irritated with how much of a nuisance his brother was being. At least Crazy Hand was drunk right now. If he was sober, even Master Hand himself could not decipher what his brother would be saying half of the time. Sober Crazy Hand was really only good for fighting.

It was time to check up on his actors. After all, he had to make sure everyone was comfortable in their new settings. When he first brought them here, a few of them made requests immediately for changes to their houses to suit their needs. Master Hand changed each one of their living quarters accordingly. He felt like some god-like figure to these characters. With a chuckle, he visited the house of Omi.

Knock, knock. After a brief wait, Omi opened the door and looked at Master Hand.

"Good morning, master. How are you doing?" he asked Master Hand.

"I fare well, young monk. Are the changes to your residence as you requested to your liking?" Master Hand asked. The young monk nodded. All he wanted was a sleeping bag on the floor, books on fighting techniques, and a room to train in with his water-type attacks. Master Hand naturally agreed to these requirements and the young monk was ecstatic.

"They are indeed! You should see me punch butt in training!" he exclaimed with a smile.

"You mean kick butt?" Master Hand asked, trying to clarify.

"Punch, kick... either way I come out on bottom!" Omi exclaimed enthusiastically. Master Hand practically facepalmed. He knew most of the characters like the back of his... well... hand, but he never imagined that the excitable monk was this bad at slaughtering common phrases.

"Indeed. Well, I am pleased that you are satisfied with the changes to your living residence," Master Hand said, trying to cut the conversation short so he could escape the headache this monk was giving him. "Farewell young warrior... you have an exciting and very interesting journey ahead of you in terms of the project I have recruited you for."

"I hope to live to your expectations. I have my own expectations that my experience here with acting will help a warrior like myself become deceptive and make a victory easier to achieve," Omi said with a smile. He paused for a second before adding as an after-thought, "Not that victory is not already easy to achieve."

"Indeed it would be for you. Good luck," Master Hand said. With that, Master Hand departed from Omi's house to see who else he could check up upon. He knew better than to disturb Raven should she be meditating and he saw Yuffie exploring the area earlier so he knew she wasn't home.

That left Lloyd, John, and Sheena remaining. He went to Lloyd's house and knocked on the door. There was no response. Lloyd was another of the members who instantly requested for changes to his house. He asked for every type of twin blades that Master Hand could bring him as a collection in the house. Ever since then, Lloyd had been training with his swords in the confines of his backyard every spare minute he could.

After about two minutes of waiting, Master Hand floated to Lloyd's backyard to see that there was no one home. Sighing in resignation, Master Hand floated over to Sheena's house and knocked on her door. He hoped that at least the clumsy assassin would be home, or at the very least not knocking something over. No such luck. He thought he heard Lloyd Irving's voice for a second, but he reasoned it must be his imagination. He noticed a hastily scribbled note that was on the ground.

"Out with Lloyd."

That was just perfect, Master Hand sarcastically thought. Resigned to not being able to meet over half of his new cast, Master Hand finally made his way to the final house on his list. To be perfectly honest, he had no idea why he picked this person. He was not a canon character of any particular world; he was simply a character of an alternate dimension of a canon world who had caught his attention. His history was also mostly shrouded in mystery as Master Hand simply did not know what John did before entering the world of Tellius.

As he approached the door, he could hear an organ playing inside. Knowing John to be home, he knocked on the door. There was a loud cluster of notes on the organ as if someone inside was distracted greatly in shock by the sudden knocking. This was followed by a faint, yet somewhat vulgar stream of swear words. Within a few seconds, the door was being unlocked and opened. Standing in the doorway in a casual t-shirt and jeans was the dark-haired mage.

"Ah, you are home," Master Hand commented off-handedly.

"It would appear so," John replied while crossing his arms and leaning on the doorway. "Can I help you with something?"

"I was just checking to make sure the accomodations that you requested were to your liking," Master Hand said. He had to admit that of all the people, John's requests were the most interesting and the most fun to do.

"I am particularly pleased with how quickly you made the changes," John admitted with a smile.

"Pleased to hear that," Master Hand said.

"Would you like to come inside for a bit? You can have the chance to observe your work once again," John offered.

"Why not?" Master Hand said. It couldn't hurt to explore around the house and see it in its entirety without working on the rooms individually. Master Hand made his way into the entrance doorway to see it was all black. The ceiling, the floor, all the walls, and the two windowless doors were painted all black with no windows in the room at all. It was as if entering into complete darkness for a few seconds before returning to the real world.

Master Hand silently followed John into the living room. On three walls of the room, there were bookshelves stocked with every book that Master Hand could conjure a copy of. There was all of the Harry Potter books, all of the Artemis Fowl books, all of the Eragon books, all of the Lord of the Rings books, the Count of Monte Cristo, an anthology of the complete works of Edgar Allan Poe, an anthology of the complete works of Nathaniel Hawthorne... just to name a few. There were also informational books on various subjects on Chemistry, Physics, Calculus, and Economics.

... many of these books looked like they had never been touched and probably never will be, Master Hand thought.

On the open wall were two windows that gave a view of the front yard. Also on the wall were some paintings by Salvador Dali and Rene Magritte including Dali's famous painting of the clock and Magritte's famous painting of the man with the apple in front of his face.

"You really are heavily into the arts..." Master Hand commented aloud.

"I am a musician by trade, a writer by hobby, and an artist by love," John replied with a shrug.

The two went into the next room and found the four walls painted different colors. One was a bright orange, one was a dark blue, one was a stopsign red, and one was a forest green. In the room sat various instruments, including an organ, a harpsichord, a piano, and a marimba. John could only look at the instruments and smile to himself. This was, in essence, some kind of heaven for the child, Master Hand reasoned to himself. There was also a computer on the only table in the room with a music composition program open.

"You seem more than content with the arrangements," Master Hand commented.

"I could live the rest of my life here in solitude and never complain again in my life," John replied.

"Unless a string broke," Master Hand said in an off-hand manner. John made a face of annoyance before returning to its semi-dreamlike state.

There was the table in the room with the laptop sitting on it and along one of the walls were a few boxes of board games including Chess, Shogi, Risk, Stratego, Backgammon, Mancala... and a box of Dungeons and Dragons third edition.

"Yeah... this would be my dream home," John commented.

"At least you kept the kitchen simple..." Master Hand commented. He didn't even have an urge to re-visit the rather fanciful bathroom or the bizarre bedroom.

"You have every restaurant featuring any kind of food here in that food square you just put up. Why would I cook at home?" John asked.

"Fair point," Master Hand replied. "Was there a reason you wanted all this to the house?"

"I'm an eccentric person," John commented with a smile.

"I know eccentric..." Master Hand said while thinking about his brother.

"Crazy Hand seems to be quite an eccentric figure," John commented serenely.

It was at that moment that Master Hand did a double-take. Who was this kid? How did he know about Crazy Hand? All these thoughts were running through Master Hand's mind.

"How do you know about my brother?" Master Hand asked incredulously.

"Your brother?" John asked. "You two are actually related?"

"How do you know about him?" Master Hand said. At that, John burst out laughing at Master Hand.

"You..." he managed to say before he started laughing again.

"I don't quite get how this is funny," Master Hand said in an annoyed tone.

"You don't know who I am yet you pulled me, of all people from Tellius, to this project of yours?" he asked Master Hand.

"I know you're from Tellius," Master Hand replied in a cool tone as if trying to play off his mistake.

"Guess again," John said with a snigger. "I'm only a visitor to Tellius."

"... who are you?" Master Hand asked.

He knew John wasn't always in Tellius, but a visitor to Tellius? He didn't even say inhabitant or recent resident. He said visitor. That just did not quite gel in Master Hand's mind. He was running through the possibilities which ranged from John being a world hopper to someone out there with the telekinetic powers to pull people between dimensions like himself.

"Is that necessary to filming?" John asked.

"No... it really isn't."

"Then, would you mind if I kept that personal for now?"

"... you will tell eventually, correct?"

"Eventually," John said. If Master Hand didn't know any better, he could have sworn there was a smug smirk on John's face. It was at that moment Master Hand began to wonder what did he get himself into by bringing this stranger in. He was slightly dangerous, although it was in a very fascinating way.

The duo made their way to the front door of the house while being wary of various scraps of paper on the ground with notes, both literary and musical, on it as well as wires that connected the laptop to various recording microphones across the room.

"It will be quite an interesting experience to be working with you on this production," John said to Master Hand as they passed through the front doorway.

"It will be indeed," Master Hand replied. With that, Master Hand departed toward his own residence as John retreated back into his own house, the sound of a harpsichord in the house attempting to play a Bach three-part invention in b-minor.

Author's Notes: Thus ends the last chapter that focuses on Master Hand. Starting with the next chapter, now that all the exposition and the introductions are out of the way, it will be more character-centric and more oriented to the... plot? There will be fun times on the first day of filming.

Will the actors get along... or will there be more drama off stage than on stage? Will I ever plan these things out? Find out these things and more in the next chapter of...

Popcorn.

And.

Pearls!

... and now I hear DragonBall Z fans groaning at that.


	3. The Pit of Royalty

Chapter 3:

The Pit of Royalty

It was the first day of production and Master Hand was extremely proud of himself. He had produced the script for the first five episodes of his adaptation of the Naruto anime in live action form. All the actors had been given a copy of each script and was instructed to practice the lines for their characters. The sun rose upon the sets of houses which now had more people living in the little "city" of performers.

It was a bright and sunny morning that just seemed to hold much promise for the young actors. Rays of sunshine shone in through the windows of each actress' and actor's house. All the performers were to report at the studio at exactly 3 PM, so they were given all morning to enjoy their last moments of fooling around.

Sheena was walking down the street of the food court, enjoying the very fact that they had so many choices and they were all free. After travelling around the new combined world with Lloyd and solving the mana problem with Emil, it was good to finally be treated to a short time of rest and relaxation.

The variety was also just food that Master Hand created out of thin air, but the sentiment for having variety was still there all the same. At least, that was where Master Hand had claimed the food came from. Sheena had suspicions that he had yanked chefs from other worlds for them.

"Hey Sheena!"

Sheena turned around toward the voice to spot Lloyd walking down the same path as her. She slowed her pace to have her friend from Sylvarant catch up to her.

"Hey, Lloyd," Sheena replied warmly and with a smile.

"You excited for this?" Lloyd asked her.

"Free time to train, new people to associate with, and a well deserved vacation after the stress of our journey? I'm relieved just to be here," Sheena replied.

"I am too. Traveling with the same people for months really gets boring," Lloyd said with a smile.

"So, I'm boring to you now?" Sheena asked.

"Boring as can be," Lloyd replied with a laugh.

"You jerk!" Sheena said as she punched Lloyd lightly on the arm. Lloyd flinched ever so slightly. Even as a joke punch, that playful attack still packed some spice. Sheena was no weakling at all... as everyone in their group knew. She once held off four of them at once when they were still enemies. She was in a battle to kill one of them; they were evenly matched until Lloyd landed a lucky blow, thus saving the life of his childhood friend, Colette Brunel. That was in the past, though. The two quickly became best friends.

"Did you eat yet?" Lloyd asked Sheena.

"No, I was going to get something to eat," Sheena replied.

"So was I. Let's go get some ramen. My treat," Lloyd said. Sheena mentally facepalmed at the fact Lloyd offered to treat despite the fact the food was free.

"... are you in character already?" Sheena asked jokingly. Lloyd gave her a patronizing glare, although it only lasted for a second before his face showed signs of defeat.

"I guess so," Lloyd replied.

"You read the script already?" Sheena asked.

"Just the first episode. How about you?"

"All five. Rather interesting storyline in some places, although I have to say the main character is an idiot," Sheena said.

"I don't think he's an idiot. I related to him quite a bit."

"My point exactly."

"Oh be quiet," Lloyd replied with a pout. Sheena laughed slightly to herself. Teasing Lloyd was so easy because he always got so flustered when he was teased; it was also pretty darn easy to do.

They went inside a quaint looking restaurant in town. As they went inside, they were greeted by a courteous waiter in the restaurant. There was someone already in the restaurant, but they couldn't tell who it was from behind. The person seemingly was engrossed with eating their ramen, so Lloyd and Sheena sat on the other end of the restaurant from the person.

The waiter came over and handed the two their menus and asked them what they would like to drink.

"Water," both replied in unison. They looked at each other and smiled slightly at each other in great amusement. Their extremely close friendship was always a sense of discomfort for Lloyd's girlfriend, Colette Brunel, despite the fact that the two girls were very good friends.

"Waiter, could you please bring me the chef? This soup is marvelous. I must congratulate him!" the person said. The waiter bowed in response and went into the kitchen.

"So, I guess the soup here is marvelous," Sheena said in a mocking tone quietly so that only Lloyd could hear.

"Maybe he just doesn't have any sense of taste," Lloyd replied with a smirk.

"Is that a clever comment by Lloyd Irving? What has this world come to?" Sheena asked mockingly.

"Oh shut up," Lloyd replied in a slightly annoyed tone.

"You have to admit those are pretty rare," Sheena said to Lloyd.

"They are n-"

"You! You're the one that scared the shit out of me years ago!"

The two quickly turned to the ramen-eating conneisseur to see him pointing at the chef.

"Ah, yes, I taught you how to make Beef Stew back in Daein," the chef said.

"What's going on?" Lloyd and Sheena both asked. They both soon ate their words as they spotted someone who sometimes haunted their nightmares.

"Lloyd, Sheena!" the person said as he rounded the corner.

"... it's the wonder chef," Lloyd moaned aloud, which earned him an elbow to the gut by Sheena. The other patron, which the other two recognized as John, heard Lloyd's comment and looked over curiously.

"Yes, it is me! How have you two been."

"Tired," Lloyd replied.

"Perhaps you would like the recipe for Energy Punch?" the Wonder Chef asked.

"I'll pass," Lloyd replied.

"Well, then... I would love to chat, but I have some cooking to attend to," the Wonder Chef commented.

"Yes, please go cook," Lloyd replied, intimidation and fear in his voice. As the Wonder Chef left, John walked over to the two.

"You two have a bad history with him?" John asked curiously.

"Everyone in our group has. How about yourself?" Lloyd asked.

"I was in a tent picking up a spear for a fellow soldier when it exploded into smoke and he was shouting at me. I was petrified for a few minutes," John replied as he reminisced upon the horrible moment.

"Doesn't beat a story Sheena has," Lloyd said with a snigger.

"Oh?" John asked.

"I had just taken a bath in a river in the moonlight. It was a warm summer night so I decided to clean up while we were on our journey. I reached for the towel, except... it wasn't a towel! It was that freak. I decked him so hard out of reflex, he went flying at least twenty yards."

The spite in that recount was obvious as every word was laced with harsh venom, poisoning the very atmosphere of the room.

"He wanted to teach me how to make pigs in a blanket," Sheena added, trying to dispel the tension she accidentally created in the room.

"You decked him out of reflex and he went flying that far?" John asked as he raised an eyebrow.

"Yeah, Sheena's a powerful person in our group," Lloyd said.

"That must suck for you," John replied.

"Why?" they both asked.

"I meant Lloyd," I said.

"Why would it be bad for me?" Lloyd asked.

"I mean, you two are dating... right?" John asked. The two looked at each other before bursting out into laughter.

"No! Haha, no..." the both said while laughing. They held their hands out as if shoving away the startlingly ludicrous notion. John frowned ever so slightly. He always was a fan of the Sheena and Lloyd pairing from Tales.

"Oh, sorry... I thought you two were," John commented.

"Nah, we're just best friends. Plus, I think Colette would object if I dated her boyfriend," Sheena said.

"Colette...?" John asked.

"She's a friend of ours," Sheena replied. "She is also Lloyd's girlfriend."

"I'm sorry you're being parted from her," John said sympathetically. "It is hard when the girl you love is in another world."

"It is..." Lloyd replied. John paused and spaced out for a moment, as if he was mulling something over in his head. He quickly returned with a smile, though.

"Nothing like slurping a bowl of warm, delicious ramen to cheer you up, though!" John said with a smile to Lloyd.

"What?" Lloyd asked.

"Get the ox-tail. It's phenomenally good!" John said with a huge smile.

"Um, sure..." Lloyd said uncertainly.

"Did you read the script?" Sheena asked him.

"I've seen the original source that our boss is basing this... production upon," John replied.

"Really? Is it any good?" Lloyd asked.

"It's fairly decent," John replied.

"I see. I like what we have so far," Sheena said.

"It was slightly edited from the original. I am slightly relieved at how much it's improved at least," John commented.

"Who were you cast as?" Lloyd asked.

"Sasuke," John replied with a bit of an odd face.

"What's that face for?" Sheena asked.

"You'll see later in the show..." John replied. "Who are you cast as?"

"I got Naruto," Lloyd said.

"I got... Hinata?" Sheena said.

"Isn't that convenient," John said jokingly.

"What's that supposed to mean," Lloyd asked. Sheena coughed awkwardly.

"It's nothing," Sheena replied to Lloyd hastily. John smirked slightly at her response.

"How different is this version compared to the original?" Lloyd asked.

"Different enough to actually be better than the original. A lot more characterization and a lot more believability," John commented.

"I wonder who is playing as Sakura then," Sheena asked.

"Or Ino," John groaned while rolling his eyes.

"What, you don't like having adoring girls fawning over you?" Sheena asked with a joking smile.

"Not particularly," John replied.

"The third episode seems fun," Sheena said.

"Why?" Lloyd asked.

"Just to see how many times it takes to get this one scene between Naruto and Sasuke right," Sheena said. John paled at that comment.

"Oh HELL no! I forgot!" John said.

"Pucker up," Sheena said. John grumbled angrily.

"Okay... I need to go and ponder how I'm going to fare doing that," John said with a hint of finality.

"Sure," Sheena replied. "Good to actually talk to you."

"... and share horror stories of being invaded and intruded upon by the wonder chef," John commented back.

"... and talking to someone who knows the original source," Lloyd added.

"Indeed," Sheena agreed meekly.

"Seeya," John said. Lloyd and Sheena both bade their farewells to the enigmatic figure.

"Well, that was slightly odd," Sheena commented.

"He is slightly odd," Lloyd corrected.

"He's not that bad... just different from what we're used to. These are very different worlds we're talking about."

"I thought we were done with the split worlds... now we find more than Tethe'alla and Sylvarant," Lloyd moaned.

"Don't worry Lloyd. At least those worlds won't need merging. They were naturally apart. It's not like they're fighting each other for mana," Sheena consoled him.

"I suppose. Knowing our luck, we'll probably be on a journey for them, though."

"I think everyone here has the same bad luck we do in their worlds," Sheena mentioned.

"You're right," Lloyd replied.

The two ordered their meals through the waiter and sat patiently in the restaurant while waiting for their orders to come through.

"I wonder who is Sakura anyway. She is supposed to have this obsessive crush on Sasuke and Naruto is supposed to have an obsessive crush on her," Sheena mused.

"Sakura? Sasuke?" Lloyd asked.

"Oh, right, you didn't read past the first episode," Sheena commented.

"I think I'll do that as soon as I get home," Lloyd said.

"You? Reading?" Sheena asked. Before Lloyd could answer, an unfamiliar face appeared in the restaurant.

Both took a slight gasp at how regally dainty and royally ditzy the person looked. She had long blonde hair that extended down to her waist. Perched on top of her head was a small crown. She wore an excessively ornate dress with two different shades of pink on it. On her chest was some kind of blue talisman or amulet. She wore large sky blue earrings on each ear, which matched both the trinket pinned on her chest and her sky blue eyes.

"Good afternoon," Lloyd stumbled out, trying to find appropriate and formal words to such a person who appeared before them. The blonde smiled at Lloyd, causing him some discomfort at the moment.

"Good afternoon!" the young lady replied to the two young adults in the restaurant.

"Are you here for the filming?" Lloyd asked the regal young lady. Sheena literally facepalmed, albeit somewhat subtly, at Lloyd's question.

"I am," she replied cordially. This person clearly was of royalty in whatever world she was from. Sheena noted her formal mannerisms, her posture, and her attire gave away this fact. Being a resident in her home village promptly allowed her to be able to achieve such feats as noticing slight details to assess a person.

"That's great! So are we!" Lloyd exclaimed. "What's your role?"

"I was given the role of... Sakura," the lady said, pausing for a moment as she thought about how the name was pronounced.

"Oh," Sheena said with a smile. She figured that kid John would have fun having this young lady obsess over him on set, even if it was all just an act.

"I apparently have the role of Naruto and my friend here has the role of Hinata," Lloyd said to the lady. She nodded slightly in response and smiled at the two.

"Not to be rude for asking so late in the conversation, but what is your name?" Sheena asked. Lloyd, for a split second, made a face of sluggish realization that he was conversing with a girl whose name he didn't know before he covered it up with his usual cheerful, optimistic demeanor.

"Peach," she simply replied.

"As in, the fruit?" Lloyd asked. Sheena smacked him on the head as the girl laughed.

"Yes... I got that little association a few times when I joined and participated in the Smash Brothers tournament," Peach said with a smile.

"Smash brothers?" Lloyd asked.

"It was a gathering of a few fighters just to settle old rivalries and see who was indeed better," Peach explained.

"You are royalty, are you not?" Sheena asked.

"I am indeed royalty. I am Princess Peach of the Mushroom Kingdom," Peach said.

"Wow, our producer didn't put in any stops when it came to picking his all-star cast," Lloyd commented.

"I only just got here a day ago and was briefed about what was to happen and what role I was doing. I also received a copy of the script," Peach said.

"I look forward to working with you," Lloyd said.

"Same," Peach said.

"Thanks," Sheena replied with a smile.

"Would you like to sit with us?" Lloyd asked.

"That would be greatly appreciated," Peach replied. With that, she sat with the other two. The waiter took her order as well and together the three of them chatted idly about various non-serious topics. They finished their meals early and took a leisurely, scenic route to the production studio. They finally arrived ten minutes ahead of time and sat down. Much to their surprise, they were the only ones in the studio.

"Well, it seems to be time to begin this thing," Lloyd commented.

"Are you ready?" Sheena asked the two with her.

"As ready as I can be," Lloyd said confidently.

"I believe I am," Peach replied.

"Then... let's do this."

Author's Notes: ... and so it begins.


End file.
